Dementia Care

Sarah Dyke Excerpts

Tuesday 3rd June 2025 Commons Chamber

[Claire Young (Thornbury and Yate) (LD)]

Everyone deserves high-quality care when they need it—that is particularly the case for those with dementia, who often have some of the most complex needs—but the sad reality is that social care services in this country are in crisis. The disease has a huge impact not only on the patients, but on their family and friends as they struggle to care for them.

Richard wrote to me about his experience of being a full-time carer for his wife of 55 years. She has ataxia, compounded by dementia. She is losing her ability to walk or talk, write or use the phone, or follow simple instructions, and Richard has to be with her 24/7 to ensure her safety. The daily routine starts with getting his wife out of bed; transporting her to the bathroom; helping her with the toilet; getting her into the shower and then getting in the shower to shower her; helping her clean her teeth; getting her back to the bedroom to dry her hair and dress her; taking her downstairs via their self-funded stairlift; getting her into a wheelchair to transport her to the dining table for breakfast; and then taking her back to the lounge. She may sleep for a little bit, but sooner or later there will be a call for help to go to the toilet, so it is back into the wheelchair, back on the stairlift and back on the toilet. Richard will clean and dress her, and then she will go back on the stairlift, back into the wheelchair and back into the lounge, where the whole palaver will repeat after five minutes, as she has forgotten that she has already been to the toilet and cannot be convinced otherwise.

That is just one small part of a day, and it sounds relentless. Owing to a recent back injury, Richard has had to employ a carer for two mornings a week to help. He wants to care for his wife as long as he can, but one day he may have to move her to a nursing home, and that worries him. He reckons it will cost approximately £1,800 per week and rising due to the increase in national insurance, and he is now worried that in pandering to populism on immigration, the Government may make it even harder to recruit carers. He says:

“Once again, it is the least fortunate and needy of us who will bear the cost.”

Another constituent wrote:

“When my wife was first diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2019, we were given a couple of booklets and told to prepare for the inevitable.”

He went on to explain that for a couple of years, including during the covid lockdown, they saw no one apart from the occasional surgery visit, until a crisis in 2023 led to the community mental health team being involved. For a while, his wife got a fair amount of support, but when the mental health team deemed her stabilised, that support was withdrawn, leading to another crisis in January 2024. He is very worried that the whole cycle will play out again and again.

[Sarah Dyke (Glastonbury and Somerton) (LD)]

My hon. Friend reminds me of a conversation that I had with William, a constituent from High Ham who has been caring for his wife, who has had Alzheimer’s for many years. He has relied on the intensive dementia support team in Yeovil, but the service has recently been reorganised. As a result, it has become quite fragmented across Somerset and there is no central contact or clear structure. There are incomplete records, leaving some carers adrift. Does my hon. Friend agree that streamlining dementia care services is vital to ensure clarity and co-ordination for carers?

--- Later in debate ---

[Dr Danny Chambers (Winchester) (LD)]

I thank my hon. Friend the Member for South Devon (Caroline Voaden) for securing this important debate. Listening to the stories from Members on all sides of the House, it is clear that this is not simply a political debate; it is deeply personal to pretty much everyone here.

My father had dementia. He was a typical Irish farmer; he was very strong-willed, physically tough and fiercely independent, and he was used to working all hours of the day. Watching that man slip away, becoming increasingly confused, anxious and very often unreasonably angry, was one of the most heartbreaking experiences of my life. I know I am not alone in experiencing that, as we have heard very similar stories.

Many Members have said that with dementia we lose the person we love twice—first slowly, piece by piece, and then again at the end. The final loss can feel like a relief, because it is a prolonged bereavement; the grief starts sometimes years before. Dementia is a brutal disease, not just for those who are experiencing it but for those who are caring. For spouses, children and families, it is relentless emotional toil, sleepless nights and endless juggling of tasks.

[Sarah Dyke]

My hon. Friend shares his experience of losing his father. I lost my father in the same way, and he too was a proud farming man. I want to raise an issue from a constituent who contacted me about her father James. He is currently alone in a room in a hospital, and he is scared to mix with other violent dementia patients. He wants to be at home, and the family want him to be at home, but there are barriers in social care in Somerset at the moment. Does my hon. Friend agree that dementia patients should be able to live independently at home, with dignity, and receive the care—

[Madam Deputy Speaker]

Order.